


Beating Heart

by Uki96



Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (2015)
Genre: Frustration, Illya is his usual self, M/M, Napoleon is a Little Shit, lots and lots of frustration
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-08
Updated: 2016-01-08
Packaged: 2018-05-12 16:01:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5671834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Uki96/pseuds/Uki96
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"For some reason, I'm attracted to you." - "Of course you're attracted to me, I mean, who wouldn't? Have you seen me?" Where Napoleon is a little shit and Illya can't stand him anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beating Heart

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first story in English. I apologize for any mistake, I am not familiar with this language so I hope my beta (Le Spleen Du Kiwi Bleu) and I removed all the mistake. ENJOY!

"For some reason, I'm attracted to you."

Illya's husky and warm voice vibrated behind Napoleon, who turned around, facing the blonde guy with a smug smile on his face.

"Of course you're attracted to me, I mean, who wouldn't? Have you seen me?"

And, saying that, the American spy pointed his body. Said body being covered in a ridiculously tight suit, leaving not much place for imagination as for what its purpose was.

Illya shrugged, showing nothing but utter indifference.

"Now is not the time Cowboy, we should get going. Besides, you're not Russian, and therefore, you not attractive!

\- Well now you're just being a douche, he said with a grin on his face, approaching the blonde spy.

\- You're the one showing off, not me. Now please hurry up, the mission must be completed."

Illya's thick accent was nothing but a turn on Napoleon. He always loved to tease the Russian. Besides, it's not like Illya was refusing his advances.

Napoleon smiled harder, continuing to approach the tall spy.

"Are you sure you don't want a taste of American meat? Solo asked with a suggestive tone."

Illya opened slightly his eyes, looking at Napoleon with disbelief.

"Are you actually thinking that this – Illya pointed down at Napoleon – was enough to bring a KGB agent down? Come on, I thought the CIA were better at this!"

Napoleon backed down a little. So this was the way the Russian wanted it? Well, good for him, Napoleon was pretty good at this game, and he had always dreamt of pushing Illya to his limits.

"You tell me. What could possibly make a KGB go down? he questioned, shamelessly touching Illya's arm."

Illya stared at Napoleon.

"That's why Russia is best, because we're not corrupted!"

And, telling this, Illya turned around and went out the bathroom, leaving a surprised and amused Napoleon.

The American was determined to bring Illya to like him, whatever the prize was. Besides, the mission he had to do tonight was the perfect occasion.

Napoleon smirked, tonight was going to be a hell of a night! He was going to make sure of it.

The mission by itself was not that complicated, but it all rested on Napoleon and his ability to seduce the ambassador's son.

It wasn't the first time the great Napoleon was put to use by the CIA to seduce someone in order to have informations, and Napoleon loved to play.

Usually, this job would've been given to a girl, because obviously, the CIA didn't like to leave anything to chance, but, at U.N.C.L.E., they believed a man was just as good as any girl. Plus, the one who could succeed at dressing Gaby for that kind of mission was not born yet. So, it was Napoleon's mission, and he was always good at it.

Since he was done shaving himself, Napoleon looked at his reflection in the mirror. Really, how come anyone would not be attracted to him? He was gorgeous! Napoleon smiled, before brushing his suit to make it look perfect. That being done, the spy stepped out of the bathroom to meet his two mates.

Gaby was in the living room, sitting apart in a comfy chair, looking at Illya who was playing chest, again. The brunette, seeing Napoleon's look, confronted him.

"What did you do?

\- Me? Nothing, you would know my dear!

\- Scheißkerl, stop playing games, we must go now! The party has already started and the ambassador's son must be on our side!

\- Calm down Chop Shop Girl, I'm sure Cowboy is ready to do his job, aren't you?"

Illya's hoarse voice resounded in the room. Napoleon fixed the blonde with a smile.

"Well, of course Peril. But if you have any doubt, I'm happy to do a little rehearsal with you!

\- I won't do that, now go, you are waited."

Illya didn't even look up when Napoleon left the room. Gaby sighed, of course those two couldn't be nice to each other, it was their thing. Gaby only wished they would notice that their game was nothing but an attempt at seducing the other. Well, as for Napoleon, Gaby was sure he'd noticed.

Standing up, the German girl threw a pillow at Illya. The Russian caught it with one hand, looking at the brunette.

"Get ready, we still got work on our own."

Illya smiled a little, looking at the beautiful woman. Gaby was always the one to make him smile, and he has always wondered why they stopped dating. He suspected it had something to do with Napoleon, although he didn't know what yet.

"Waverly can wait. I am not finished.

\- Oh no! No no no! You're coming! I don't care what it takes, you're coming! NOW!"

Gaby jumped on Illya's lap, making him lose all his concentration. The spy watched Gaby with googly eyes.

"Remember when I said I like my women strong?

\- Yeah? So what?

\- I lied, Illya responded, throwing Gaby on the floor."

Gaby stood up, smiling at Illya who was finally getting ready.

"See you at the party Der Iwan.

\- Stop calling me that!

\- But you love it! Or do you prefer that I call you Peril?

\- Don't you dare!

\- Oh excuse me, I thought, since Napoleon called you that…

\- Shut it, I'm Russian.

\- Yeah, I'd figured that out by now, Gaby ironized, leaving the room to get ready."

Illya sighed, stretching his huge legs. Gaby was a pain in the ass sometimes. But she was right, they had to get ready to leave for the party.

The mission was simple, Napoleon had to enter the party, spot the ambassador's son, work his magic – sleep with him if he had to – and then retrieve the information they needed.

Napoleon was still a little unsure if the ambassador of Turkey had told his son where he was hiding the nuclear weapons, but he was not his place to question Waverly's orders.

The party was being hosted at the Ankara's Grand Hotel, and that building was nowhere near easy to break in. Napoleon was determined to use the same technic he used at Victoria Vinciguerra's party. Waverly warned him that a few important people would be attending that party, and he should targeting them.

Obviously, the director had no idea how protected those people were! Napoleon had to shut down three guys already. But he was not finished! If the men were not approachable, their women would. Napoleon just had to pull his cards nicely, women were not that trusting with strangers.

The American spotted a gorgeous woman, dressed in a beautiful Rabanne dress. Surely, she had great taste, even though Napoleon wouldn't have made the hideous choice to put a pink purse with a gold dress. But not everyone was gifted with good choice in clothing.

Anyway, the spy made his move, getting closer to the woman, who was still alone. When the man reached the red-haired, she turned to face him, her face painted with surprised.

"Affedersiniz ? Bir şey ister misiniz?"

Napoleon stumbled for a while, he didn't know how to speak Turkish. The woman, seeing that her words didn't seem to be making any sense to Napoleon, smiled.

"English I presumed?"

Her voice had a thick and warm accent, filled with oriental wonders, and Napoleon immediately passed on his seductive mode.

"Hello milady, said the American, taking her hand and kissing it gently and subtlety retrieving the lady's bracelet. May I ask what your name is?

\- I would be Irem, and to whom do I owe the pleasure?

\- My name is Will Davis, I'm a collectioner."

Irem smiled, pleased. Napoleon let go of her hand, sliding his around her waist.

"It seems I lost my invitation to a couple of thieves earlier that evening, would you mind if you could let me in with you?

\- And what do I get in returned?

\- I could always come up later to your room to chat and get to know you better, does that sound like a plan?

\- Count me in."

Napoleon let out a smug smile, proud to be that talented. Really, if he had a clone, he would kiss himself right now. As the lady approached the Hotel's entrance, Napoleon followed her with confidence. If he had learned something from all this years he spent stealing things, it was the confidence. Anything can be done if you had enough confidence.

So, the spy walked with Irem like the world was his. Of course, the receptionist put up a little scene, but nothing that couldn't be solved with Irem's money and reputation.

The party was already started when Napoleon walked in with his partner, and with all those people, he couldn't find the ambassador's son.

"Excuse me Milady. Would you know, by any chance, if the Ambassador's son is here with us tonight? I was supposed to meet him, but since I'm already late, I can't find him in this crowd.

\- Of course my dear Will. The ambassador and his family are over there."

She pointed out a group of persons sitting in a table, near the bar.

"I thank you Milady, have a good evening.

\- Don't forget our appointment!

\- How could I forget one like you? You're a vision for sore eyes.

\- Go, before I decide to keep you for myself the whole night!"

Napoleon smiled and left Irem, walking towards the ambassador and his family. Lucky for the spy, he didn't have to come up with any kind of excuse, because as soon as he came near the table, the younger man stood up of the table, looking at the person next to him.

"Dad, you're way above your jurisdiction, I'm leaving."

Napoleon raised a curious eyebrow, before following the man who just left. The man was actually attractive, for once, Napoleon would be pleased to do his job, not that he wasn't always, but it was nice being around gorgeous people.

The man was tall and blonde, he had the face of an angel, and the eyes of the devil. Really, what could go wrong?

When the man finally noticed he was being followed, he stopped walking and turned around, facing Napoleon.

"Hello, may I help you?

\- Actually, yes. You can."

Napoleon set his sexiest smile for the man, who looked at him suspiciously.

"You know, I was looking for you, Napoleon said, engaging the conversation.

\- Really? And why is that, mystery man?

\- Pardon me, I'm Will Davis.

\- Pleasure. I'm Sonny, the ambassador's son. Are you here to see my father?

\- Oh no, I came to see you. Your father is a very interesting man, but I'm more interested in you actually."

Napoleon's charming smile made Sonny blush. The American knew it would be just as planned when Sonny got closer to him.

"So, what would you like to know Mr. Davis?

\- First, can we go somewhere more… private?

\- Sure!"

Napoleon followed the man to his room, smiling like the Cheshire cat, this mission was going way too well.

Illya was fulminating. How dare Napoleon be that reckless?

First, that stupid spy exposed himself in front of the Lady Irem, one of the most powerful women in this country, thank god he didn't say his real name. Second, he just went to talk to the ambassador's son with nothing that looked like a plan.

Really, the American was way too idiot, how come he had survived that long?

And Illya was furious because Napoleon was now having sex with 'Sonny' – what a ridiculous name – and he was apparently giving all he could.

"Stupid Cowboy, muttered the blonde."

The Russian spy moved around the guest, trying not to lose track of Gaby or Napoleon. Speaking of which, Gaby didn't seem to need anyone's help. Her job was to break into the ambassador's office, and by the look of it, she was doing just fine.

Mumbling that this was not the Russian way, Illya looked around, trying to catch anything or anyone who was out of place. Really, he hated doing monitoring.

Besides, all the noises he could hear in his earpiece were not making this any easier. Hearing Napoelon's moaning or Sonny's begging was not something he wished to cross off his bucket list!

Of course not, Illya was not jealous, but he wished someone else would've been doing this job. What was Waverly thinking? Sending Napoleon? This was a suicide mission! The American would blow the whole thing up!

Illya did not sign up for this, no!

"Illya? Der Iwan? What the hell do you think you're doing? Get your shit together right now!

\- Gaby?

\- Well good guess! What the hell Illya? Move! You're starting to bring attention to yourself!"

Illya looked up to the windows at the first floor, where Gaby was watching him.

« And stop looking at me! Gosh why do I always end up playing mother? I'm not drunk enough for this shit! Der Iwan, you owe me a drink… Come to think of it, make it two! Now move! »

Illya winced, he hated when Gaby was right. But he knew the German girl couldn't resist some alcohol, so he was getting away with this just fine.

Walking down the hall, Illya spotted an empty chair hidden in a dark corner. Sitting there, the blonde stared blankly at the party, still listening to Napoleon's groaning and moaning. Since when Cowboy's voice was that sexy?

Illya straightened up with surprise.

"Oh no! This is not Russian way! Cowboy won't get inside my head! I'm a KGB agent!"

Illya was feeling better saying this out loud. Of course Solo wasn't sexy, have you seen this arrogant brat?

"Great! Now he's talking to himself."

Illya went red.

"Дерьмо!

\- Now that I did understand! And do yourself a favor, if you fancy the American, all I'm asking is for you two to be quiet at night, I care about my sleeping hours !

\- I don't… this is not… how…

\- Now shut it, someone's here need to work!'

Illya growled, why did this keep happening to him? He didn't ask for any of it! Plus, he was not attracted to some lazy American who wasn't even careful enough not to get caught while he was on a mission!

Napoleon was resting next to Sonny, smiling at the man. The spy was not really smiling at the man, more to the fact that he had heard all of Illya's torments while he had sex, and it was music to his ears.

Napoleon would've not dreamt about a better situation than this one, he never missed a chance of pissing the Russian off!

Still, the extraction of information was way too easy, thanks to Sonny's daddy issues! Really Napoleon couldn't seem to make him stop talking. How come someone could speak that much? It was starting to annoy the American.

But there was still one thing he could do before leaving the party, and that was piss Illya off one more time.

"Tell me Sonny. How would you feel if we go for another round?"

The blonde guy smiled harder, before throwing himself on Napoleon. Luckily enough, the sex wasn't bad. Sonny wasn't as good as Napoleon had hoped but his enthusiasm was refreshing.

Napoleon was just starting to have sex when he heard someone knocking at the door. The spy repressed a smile while the two men quickly get dressed before Sonny went opening the door.

Napoleon stayed on the bed, arms behind his head, looking smugly at the ceiling, waiting for the intruder to go away.

"Excuse, my father is asking for me, I have to go, I excuse myself.

\- Well it was great while it last, said Napoleon, still with a big smile on his face, knowing exactly who interrupted them."

Sonny smiled a little before disappearing. Napoleon scratched his chest, waiting for the moment to happen. Thankfully for him, Illya was not the type to wait.

"How dare you compromised this entire mission?

\- Well, Peril, if you wanted to participate, you should've said so, there was still room for you.

\- Mудак! Stop being so stupid, we have mission to accomplish, and you're just screwing around!"

Napoleon was adoring this, Illya's forehead vein was pulsing really hard. Napoleon loved seeing Illya's choleric face, it was hilarious. His eyes were wide opened, his lips were tight with anger, and his jaw was tensed.

"My poor Peril, life hasn't been easy, has it?

\- Don't push me over the edge!

\- Now that face just makes want to do the opposite."

Illya was red, how could he even dare to say that to his face?

"You're just stupid little man, snorted the blonde, preparing to walk away from his own personal Nemesis.

\- It's a shame you don't want to benefit from this.

\- You wish, Cowboy. Unfortunately, I have other things to do, and you too. Now get up and get dressed, you're a shame!"

Napoleon smiled wryly, watching Illya's strong back walking away. The Russian was much harder to seduce than expected. But that didn't mean he was ready to abandon the idea yet.

Napoleon dressed himself up, being cautious not to crease his suit, before leaving the suite. He had all the information he needed, his presence was not required here anymore.

Napoleon was on his way out when a hand suddenly grab his arm, making him turn.

"Irem, noticed Napoleon with a big and seductive grin.

\- Dear Will, I hope you didn't forget our little arrangement.

\- Of course not, how about right now?

\- Marvelous!"

Napoleon followed the woman back in her hotel suite. The spy was not that thrilled. Not that he was complaining about having sex, that part, he got it covered. No, what bothered him was that this setback was compromising the whole operation.

Illya was dazed. This American was getting it once again. Could he even control himself around people? How come every beautiful person ended up on his bed? That was beyond Illya's comprehension. Napoleon's need for sex was something he did not understand, and it was making him furious.

Besides, he was a little bit jealous, of Napoleon, or Irem, he didn't know yet. But he was Russian, so he shut his mouth and gritted his teeth while the American was having some good sex with the woman.

Gaby arrived not that much longer after Napoleon second orgasm. The brunette immediately saw that something was wrong with the spy.

"What happened, asked Gaby, walking outside the party, Illya at her arm.

\- Nothing. Why'd you ask?

\- Just curious, you look like Napoleon's pissed you off."

Gaby knew she was right when Illya clenched his fists.

"And here we go again! I want to sleep tonight, so whatever the hell is going on, sort it out!

\- There is absolutely nothing going…

\- Yeah and I'm Russian! Now please go and tell your boyfriend to stop messing with your head and my sanity!

\- He's not… we're not… Actually he's the one to… how dare you?"

Gaby stopped walking, giving Illya a bored look.

"Whatever keeps you asleep at night Der Iwan.

\- I already told you not to call me that!

\- Yeah, I heard that, in between two arguings with Napoleon."

Gaby burst out of laughing when she saw Illya's face. Luckily for her, the man hadn't been able to kill her as they were finally arrived at their hotel.

The two of them went upstairs to their room. Gaby watched as Illya was ranging all his stuff. He was organized, Gaby was giving him that. All they needed to do right now was report to Waverly, and waiting for Napoleon to come back from his mission.

"Speaking of which, where's Napoleon?"

Illya froze, then faced Gaby.

"Well, Cowboy decided it was in our best interest if he kept screwing everyone at the party.

\- I see… Did I just hear jealousy Illya?

\- What? No! Absolutely not! There's no way in hell I… No! Черт!

\- Whatever you say. Tell me, what do you see in the mirror? Gaby asked, with genuine concern."

Illya looked surprised for a moment, before answering his friend.

"My reflection, da!

\- Then if you're not blind, how are you that oblivious?"

Illya raised an eyebrow, looking confused. But Gaby was already gone in the shower, so the Russian never got the chance to ask what she meant by that.

Later in the evening, when Illya was playing his chess game and Gaby was drinking a scotch, as usual, Napoleon finally came back from the party. The two looked at him with complete surprise. Illya looked down before speaking to the spy.

"So… not dead yet?

\- Of course not, Napoleon answered with a huge smile. I wouldn't dare dying before tasting a piece of that ass."

Gaby chuckled in her glass, while Illya was looking at the American with anger.

"Stop playing games, Cowboy. We're not in America!

\- But you're so funny, and you love it anyway. Come join me in the shower if you dare."

And with that ultimatum, the American fled the room, leaving Gaby alone to deal with an angry ex-KGB agent.

"Oh no, don't look at me like that, I'm not the one he proposed, Gaby said, hiding the best she could her smile."

Illya didn't answer anything, instead, he just went back to his chessboard, looking at the pawns like they were a personal offense.

When Napoleon finished his shower, he reported to Waverly. After he was done talking, he went straight to the bedroom, before collapsing on top of the bed.

Illya was the last one awake. He was hearing Gaby snoring gently on the sofa, and he supposed Napoleon was sleeping, since it was an hour and a half since he showered. The Russian silently put away his game, before going to sleep.

Changing himself in his PJs, Illya slipped into the sheets.

"What the hell? Illya?"

The voice in the dark sounded surprised. Illya swore, before turning on the light.

"Cowboy!

\- Well now, Peril. If you wanted to sleep with me, you just had to ask you know?

\- It. Is. My. Bed!

\- Well… now that's a relief for you, you can always take mine if you want! Or can we snuggle?

\- Get off my damn bed!"

The blonde took Napoleon by his arm, before pulling the man out. Napoleon didn't move a bit, making Illya more furious.

"Stop acting like a child and come to bed, admonished Napoleon, repressing his huge grin."

Illya stopped everything and watched the American with his blue-ice eyes.

"Don't make me put you over my knee!

\- Now that is something I would like to see!"

Napoleon tapped the place next to him.

"Come on, I'll be gentle I promise!"

Illya sighed.

"I hate you Cowboy."

And with that said, the blonde went to lay down on Napoleon's bed.

"What a shame really."

Napoleon's voice was a little sad, but Illya couldn't care less. The spy was not in the mood for jokes.

Next morning, Illya woke up a little later than usual, but Napoleon was already out of the room, so it was no big deal, the Russian liked to wake up slowly.

Getting out of bed, Illya headed to the living room, when he heard Napoleon and Gaby arguing.

"Really, could you be a little gentler with him?

\- Come on Gaby, you know I can't help it. And I don't want to!

\- Moron! If you could see the look on his face each time you slept with someone, you would…

\- I would what Gaby? It's obvious he doesn't care about anyone other than himself.

\- Ugh, you're tiring me. If you can't get a grip on yourself, you'll never get your chance."

Illya was shocked. It was him they were referring? Absolutely not. There was no chance the American was interested in him, and Illya wasn't into him either, was he?

Illya stepped back a little, not wishing to be discovered, and went back to his room. Minutes later, Napoleon entered the room, a big smile on his face when he noticed Illya was awake.

"Peril! Enjoyed last night?

\- Shut it Cowboy."

Napoleon grinned at Illya, before going to the bathroom.

The American slowly undressed himself, not bothering to close the door. Napoleon revealed slowly his muscular chest. Then, he started to unbutton his trousers slowly.

"Enjoying the show Peril?

\- Well I don't mind at all."

Illya's face went blank, he wasn't supposed to say that out loud. Napoleon looked at the spy with a huge smile on his face.

"I knew you found me attractive.

\- Of course, especially when you shut your mouth!

\- Now don't be such a pain in the ass. You can touch if you want.

\- Please, as if I wanted to catch some sexually transmitted diseases!

\- Nicely done Peril, why don't you come and check if everything's alright?

\- Won't you ever shut up?

\- Make me.

\- Is it an order?

\- Just a statement."

Napoleon looked at Illya, waiting for an answer. The blonde stood up, approaching the American like a predator. Illya was so close to Napoleon, he could almost smell his breath.

Illya slowly, touched Napoleon's heart with his hand. The American shuddered under the touch, but said nothing.

The Russian caressed Napoleon's soft chest hair with a wild smile.

"It seems like I finally succeeded at shutting you up.

\- Well please continue, I actually enjoy being quiet!

\- I can think of a better way."

Illya came closer to Napoleon who was standing still, not moving, even a toe.

When Illya's lips touched his own, Napoleon closed his eyes, not wishing for this scene to end.

Illya's soft lips were warm and dominant as he took control of the kiss, pressing his hand against Napoleon's neck.

Illya's other hand went touching Napoleon's chest again, caressing him gently. The American started to move, making his way onto Illya's body, touching, feeling, and discovering every part of the Russian.

Illya's breathing was erratic, as Napoleon still touched his torso, moving down to his crotch.

"Well, Cowboy, are you in a rush? I am not moving."

Napoleon looked back at Illya's face and, with a grin, kissed the Russian.

"Trust me, I am well aware of my gift."

The brown man then started slowly to get off his trousers, leaving nothing but his underwear. Napoleon approached his hands to Illya's jacket, but the blonde stopped him.

"Can't touch!

\- We said nothing about me not undressing you!

\- This is Russian way."

Napoleon pouted, which made Illya smile a little more.

"But please, be my guest, I'd love to see what is underneath those boxers!

\- No! Not if I can't at least see you shirtless!"

Napoleon turned, letting Illya admiring his strong back.

"Well, in that case, I guess I'll just have to get to bed."

And, saying this, Illya started to leave the bathroom, but Napoleon stopped him, grabbing his hand.

"No! Oh no! You're not leaving until you're hard as a rock!

\- It's a challenge Cowboy?

\- No, it would implied you had a chance to win, and we both know I'm the best at this Peril!

\- So smug, you're just an arrogant brat.

\- But you love this, don't you?"

Napoleon was now embracing Illya with his arms, rubbing himself slowly with his body. The blonde was still managing to keep his composure, even if Napoleon could feel his crotch twitching.

But Illya, being a pure Russian, was not letting himself lose. His hands were moving all around Napoleon's hairy body. Illya started by massaging slowly his chest, and Napoleon let out a moan, it felt so good.

"Come on now Cowboy, don't be greedy."

Napoleon growled, before turning, putting his back against Illya's torso. Napoleon was going to show this big Russian how good he was with his hips.

The spy was dancing sensually, putting Illya's hands on his waist and rubbing his perfect ass onto the blonde's crotch.

"You're giving everything you have, aren't you?

\- Well, don't complain Peril, I'm doing this the way you want."

Napoleon should've shut his mouth. Illya's grabbed his arms, turning him back, and pushing him against the wall. Napoleon's smile get wilder.

"So you like it rough Peril? Fine by me."

Illya's didn't say anything, he just went licking the other man's neck slowly, tasting the skin. Napoleon tried to free himself, but the Russian was way stronger than him. Napoleon was muscular, but Illya was powerful. And the American loved it, he was always controlling everything, it was nice to have a little fight sometimes, but he was not going to let himself surrender that easily.

The Russian kept licking Napoleon, going down, sucking the nipples and biting them softly, making it hard for the other man not to moan loud and clear. Illya was good with his tongue, the brown man had to give him that, but he had other talents.

Napoleon, still held back by Illya's strong grip, slipped his leg around his waist, grinding his body against the blonde's. Napoleon grinned like a predator when he saw Illya biting him a little harder, restraining himself of moaning or making any sound at all.

"Trust me Peril, you're not gonna win this one."

This remark earned him a bite on his torso, which didn't bother him at all, he liked it rough and hard.

"Come on Peril, you know I'm yours, no need to remind me that."

Napoleon knew he was just being a little shit, but he couldn't stop himself from doing it. He was loving every moment of it, and Illya's tongue on his abs was making this so worth it.

But it was time to end this, either winning or losing – although, Napoleon would've hated that – but he wasn't going to last long. The Russian's hot body pressed against his own was making it hard to fight back, the heat and the pressure was so good against Napoleon's crotch.

Illya was now back on his neck, licking and biting, making the other man feel so well he was afraid he was going to come just by having his skin roughed. But what could he say? He loved it when another man was being a little violent and aggressive, and Illya was everything but gentle.

Napoleon kept squeezing Illya crotch with his ass, rubbing himself against him shamelessly. Illya was now trembling on his legs, making his whole posture weak, and allowing Napoleon to free his arms. But the American was not finished, he was going to make the other man suffer for his outrage.

Napoleon let go of his hold on Illya, before standing up on his feet. Illya had stopped licking the other man's skin, and was now looking him in the eyes, thinking about his next moves.

The two men were looking at each other like lions in a cage, circling around, wondering which one was going to attack the other first. And it was Illya, curiously, who rushed towards Napoleon, kissing him hard and teeth colliding. Soon, Napoleon went out of breath, and parted away from Illya, looking at him with bright and cheerful eyes.

The American slowly walked towards the blonde, watching him all flustered and red by the excitation. Once he reached Illya's face, the brown man just give him a peck on the corner of his lips, before slowly removing his underwear and heading to the shower.

Illya was as stiff as an iceberg, looking at a naked Napoleon with utter incomprehension. But the American made not movement to return to Illya, he was just entering the shower, like nothing ever happened. Illya was so pissed, he wished he could have had more.

"A problem Peril?"

Napoleon was staring at him with a scoffer look. Illya didn't realize he had said his thought out loud. But who cares, Napoleon knew the effect he had on him and he was playing him.

Illya had no choice but to watch Napoleon washing himself. And damn he was putting on quite the show!

Illya was getting angry at himself for losing that easily into the other man's trap. Napoleon was rubbing his chest with soap, sensually, still looking at Illya. Then, he went down, caressing his perfect abs, licking his lips while the water was streaming behind him. He was like a marine deity, came to Earth just to tempt Illya, and he was getting tempted just fine. Napoleon was gorgeous to look at.

The American had now turned around, letting Illya contemplate his muscled back and his perfectly well-shaped ass. The water was flowing from his head to the crack of his ass and the Russian was having a really hard time resisting the urge to go into that shower and fuck this bastard. But that was not the Russian way, so Illya stood by, just looking and swearing silently.

Napoleon was having the time of his life, making Illya mad was the best thing in life. The Russian was so easily flustered it was beyond funny. Besides, Napoleon knew he was a walking perfection, why not showing it? Illya wouldn't be one to disagree since he was taking his time watching the brown man showering.

Unfortunately, the American wasn't the slower person in the shower, and he was nearly done with it, and there was still no Illya with him. But there was one thing that was making it all worth it, and that was hearing Illya's grunting and panting slowly behind him. The sounds were low, like a predator, and it was turning Napoleon on so much, he couldn't decide if he should wait for the Russian to come, or just stop this masquerade and just simply pounce on Illya. Luckily for the American, he heard two steps, and suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Stop this, right now."

Illya's low and dangerous voice was making it very hard for Napoleon not to continue, but he was a fair-player, so he turned around, looking at his fellow spy.

"Oh? So I'm the winner?"

His smile was even bigger than before, and his arrogance was showing just fine. Illya was so done with the spy, he didn't care anymore, he just wanted to make him shut up, the fun and hard way.

"Shut… up."

This was the only answer Illya gave before crushing Napoleon's lips with his own in a fierce and passionate kiss. This time, Illya was not letting Napoleon controlling the kiss at all. He just went biting the lips, pushing the American against the shower's wall, making them both wet.

But he really couldn't care less, Napoleon was rubbing his leg against his waist, and it was wonderful. The kiss was overwhelming, they were taking out all their frustration on each other, Illya scratching Napoleon's chest and biting him hard. Napoleon was just ruffling and pulling the Russian's perfect blonde hair.

"Wait."

Napoleon stopped the kiss, pressing one hand on Illya's torso, to keep him a little away.

"What?"

Illya was looking at Napoleon with suspicion, but the American just cut the water flow, and pushed him outside, into the bedroom.

"Here, that's better."

The two men were soaked in water but they didn't care, all they were looking at was each other. Illya's pushed Napoleon on the bed, then lied on top of him, kissing his chest slowly and biting his nipples softly.

Napoleon was so turned on, his erection was aching, rubbing against Illya's pants, but the Russian was nowhere near releasing him, and the American was so frustrated.

"I'm going to make you cum without touching yourself.

"Is that a promise?"

Napoleon's arrogant smile was getting on Illya's nerves, so he bit Napoleon's chest harder, making him moan.

Napoleon was loving the Russian's rough treatment, he was not going to tell him, but sometimes, the American was thrilled by the idea of being a little roughed. But this time, Napoleon wanted to have some fun with the blonde too, so he flipped the guy, lying above him, and started to undress him.

Once the shirt and the pants came off, Napoleon admired his pray. Illya was red, feeling uncomfortable under Napoleon's intense gaze. The spy slowly started to lick Illya's chest, biting and scratching, marking and claiming the man. Illya was a mess under Napoleon's sweet treatment. Napoleon's lips were soft yet a little rough against the blonde's skin.

The spy was loving Illya's taste. It was masculine and sweet, the perfect combination, and he couldn't get enough of it. Napoleon started to rub himself lasciviously against Illya's crotch, in order to make him moan. And god Illya moaned. He moaned so loud Napoleon feared that Gaby was going to walk into their room to check on them.

Illya's was no silent lover, he was making all kind of noises, which was making Napoleon pretty damn proud. He already knew he was good at exciting people sexually, but that was the best reward he could ever get.

Illya's face was red, his eyes closed, biting his lips furiously. Napoleon smiled, really Illya was a vision of God himself, such indecency, it was truly amazing.

Napoleon rolled over, letting go of his grip on Illya, looking at the ceiling with a smile.

"Why did you stop?"

Illya's question shattered the silence.

"Because I could, and I did.

\- But why?

\- Because I wouldn't want for you to stop hating me, this is the best thing about you."

Napoleon couldn't contain his smile, this was getting better and better. Illya went grabbing Napoleon's dick with his hand, slowly starting to stroke it.

"So, you don't enjoy this?"

Illya whispered quietly, smiling against Napoleon's ear, he could play that game too. Napoleon closed his eyes, overwhelmed with the sensation. His dick felt so good, Illya was really good with his hand.

Napoleon was really close to release himself, but Illya didn't seem to stop, and the American was not someone to refuse a gift like this, even if it meant losing to Illya.

"Oh sweet mother of Gods."

Illya smiled even bigger, Napoleon was on the verge of coming, and it was thrilling to have that much power over him. But Illya was spiteful, and, as soon as it felt Napoleon starting to tense, he stopped every movement.

"What?"

Napoleon's loud scream was like music to Illya's ear.

"Peril you filthy Russian how dare you…

\- You can go now Cowboy, your services are no longer required."

Napoleon smiled.

"Smoothly done."

Illya smiled a little, before pushing Napoleon out of his bed, making him fall down.

"Enjoy the view for the rest of the day now, Cowboy."

Napoleon stayed on the floor for a little bit, trying to regain his breath. He was so close to having one of the best orgasm in his life, and Illya just took that pleasure from him. Maybe the American did not give him enough credit, Illya did know how to trick people sexually. But Napoleon was still the hotter one, that he was sure of it.

Getting up, the spy went to his own bed, before crawling into the sheets and looking at the ceiling. It would be difficult to find confort with an erection like his own, but Napoleon wasn't complaining, there were still plenty of days before the mission ended to get his revenge. Illya better be ready, he just started the World War III, and it was all about him.

**Author's Note:**

> Scheißkerl : Jerk  
> Der Iwan : A German insult which irritates Russians  
> Affedersiniz ? Bir şey ister misiniz? : Excuse me ? Do you want anything?  
> Дерьмо : Shit  
> Mудак : Asshole
> 
> Thank you for reading this,  
> With my sincerious love  
> Uki


End file.
